A Concise History of Ornithology

It's high time I told you, if you didn't already know, that I have a bona fide obsession with birds. So much so, that I almost never write about them here. I can't. I become overwhelmed by the task of editing and composing my racing thoughts on the subject.

I spend a lot of time reading about birds, making birds, and inventing new species in my sleep. I have practically memorized my beautiful field guides, but, in true autistic fashion, I have never been birding, nor have I ever really considered observing actual birds in the field.

I do become excited when I spot birds, if I happen to be outside. However, usually I become frustrated, because the people around me never, ever notice them. So, I often find myself saying, "Look! A female cardinal!" And everyone will say, "Huh, what? Didn't see it." This makes me feel crazy. Once, in Austin, I was standing in my front yard when five lime green tropical birds flew overhead in a triangular formation. I told David, who was standing right next to me, and I'm pretty sure he was about 70% certain that I had hallucinated. But, I hadn't. I saw the birds several more times, and determined them to be Monk Parakeets. Others have reported them in the area.

My obsession is not so narrow, though. I also like to read about the personal lives of ornithologists. I invent them, as well, and write volumes of poems about their field observations and fictional love lives.

Here are a few favorites from my collection of field
guides and other ornithology miscellanea:

I.You may not know that Ian Fleming named Agent 007 after an eminent ornithologist specializing in West Indian birds, named James Bond! When I bought this book in a used book store, it contained a newspaper clipping inside, reporting the death of ornithologist James Bond in 1989.

II.

The introduction to this field guide, a 1961 edition, is precious: "Texas, as everyone knows, is vast. So vast that it can boast a greater variety of birds than any other state in the Union. In its mid-sections, East meets West, faunally, and people who live near its center line (Fort Worth, Dallas, Waco, Austin, San Antonio, and Brownsville) have long had to carry two bird books, one in each side pocket - my eastern Field Guide to the Birds and its companion volume, A Field Guide to Western Birds. Or, if they use Richard Pough's excellent Audubon Bird Guides, three books." I also have A Field Guide to Western Birds, and Field Guide to the Birds, both of which are identical in cover and paratextual detail to the Texas version.

III.

This book is tiny, but 435 pages thick. Each page is a different color engraving from Audubon's Birds of America. I keep it in my purse, so it comes with me everywhere I go.

IV.

¡Las aves en español! ¡Qué bueno!

V.

That bird is trying to bite my finger! Initially, I thought this was a modern copy, because the color prints are so nice, and the condition of the book is perfect. I thought the cover was a vintage image, but actually, this book is a 1967 copy. Genuine vintage.

VI.

This is a vinyl record of bird songs. The bird call is played twice, then the narrator names the species responsible for the sound. My favorites are the Lazuli Bunting and the Golden-cheeked Warbler.

One of my favorite things about birds is that they have wintering grounds. Also, that they have homing devices, and weightless bones. They flock and they nest. They are social, and transmit cultural knowledge. They were probably dinosaurs. They glimpse at their surroundings while sleeping, this is called vigilant sleep. In some species, sexual selection has become so highly evolved that the males look like strange, elaborate ballerinas. Some birds even mate for life. That's more than we can say.